My 2010’s in Review

M

This post marks the second part of this duology, and will be the last post I make and post in the 2010’s. The 2010’s was a turbulent decade, as all of them should be. But for me, it was always going to be turbulent. This decade encapsulated my adolescence and early adulthood.

If one song were to sum up my decade, I would have to say that it would be this piece by OMD called ‘Of All The Things We’ve Made‘. I choose this piece of music, because I felt that the message transcends its origins. It states that, despite how much we change, we are all still the same thing deep down. Some would take that as a negative. I think of it as a positive message…

I entered this decade at the age of 12, which is almost 10 years ago now. That is amazing, to me. And in the preceding 10 years, I went through a lot. I went through high school, college, university, employment. There’s a lot to break down, I am sure you understand.

I lost my Grandma in the early days of January 2010, and for me, that was the end of my childhood, and not my 13th birthday. It was the first big change in my life, and one I don’t think I ever truly got over. I look back on myself, and think that I should have accepted help to deal with my feelings, and confusion about it all. Change hits you when you don’t expect it to, and that is what that showed me.

I feel that this decade allowed me to find out who I was as a person, and what I wanted to be. Firstly, I wanted to be chemist. I wasn’t good at science, but I was good at history, so that is what I pursued.

Secondly, I enjoyed writing, so dug into books, into writing, and eventually made this website. This website is 8 years old, as of next year. That amazes me. I looked at my old posts, and so much changed. What started as me blogging my life, turned into me writing for another website, and writing two poetry books. Thirdly, I became an amateur photographer, due to intrigue and curiosity in the medium. I’ve been taking photos since 2010, went through 3 cameras, had artwork in galleries, and I ran a photography society.

These three outlets allowed me to explore my creativity, and show my view on the world, and it manifested into other areas. My two books, as mentioned, my love of politics, and politics society. My university studies, and my friends. All were based on those three core outlets. And online media has allowed that to manifest in new and interesting ways. Computers have made our lives better, on the whole. It allows us communication, organisation, entertainment, and it now gets us employment.

Where I struggled, this decade allowed me to overcome demons and issues that were so big when I was younger, but are now minor obstacles. Losing family, my autism, my mental health, my weight, my self consciousness. I became a stronger person in this decade, thanks to my family, my tenacity, and my will to overcome it all. Not everything has gone my way, I still feel sometimes that I don’t deserve to be happy, that I didn’t earn my way in life, and that I could be better. But that’s my head. My head will always say nasty things to me. It’s up to me if I choose to listen to it.

The three years that stick out to me in the 2010’s as the best were 2012, 2016, and 2019. 2012 was the peak of my teens. I was living life, had a great friendship group, was happy, and felt I had found my tastes. It was where I became me. 2016 saw me face big challenges, such as adulthood, university, leaving home, and my mental health, and it changed me for the better. And this year, 2019, I matured. I have grown up, become softer, less angry, and more at peace with myself. Finally, I have a support base on par with 2012 again, and am happy like I was then. I am happy.

The 2020’s will end when I am 32 years old. In 2029, I will be 32. I don’t want to predict where my life will be by then, but I know one thing: it won’t be like this decade, and that’s a good thing. I don’t want a repeat of the 2010’s. Let’s see what happens next.

…We go through our lives, and we add and subtract. People, interests, fads, fashion, technology, music. It all comes and goes. Our achievements and our mistakes, as humans. All of it goes away. We are shaped by these things, but we are still the same deep down. If we make mistakes, we can go back and fix it, and redeem ourselves. That is why this song represents my decade. Long live the 2010’s.

RELATED POSTS

My 2019 in Review

About the author

Ben

Since 2012, Benjamin Attwood has written for the If you Ask Ben blog.

Add comment

Discuss.

By Ben

Archive

Follow

Dispatch

%d bloggers like this: